127.8 this morning, I think due to drinking so much water and juice yesterday :)
- Drink 3+ glass of water before breakfast
- Do some form of yoga/stretching/meditation/workout everyday, even if it’s really short
- Record all meals on the RR app
- Wake up around 6:00 every morning
- Quit procrastinating
- Post photos of meals once in a while
- Do the may squat/plank challenge
I feel like such a hypocrite. I preach eating vegan and healthy food and yoga and then I go home, eat ice cream, feel guilty, and then need to watch netflix movies or go on tumblr to feel better…
This week has been really tough for me…
Tuesday I woke up feeling horrible, knowing that something would go wrong. Even though I’d slept, it felt like tuesday was an extension of monday. When I got to school, I found out that my ex is now dating one of my old friends. I’m not mad or jealous, really, just frustrated that he gets to be happy even though he’s kindof an asshole and the girl he’s dating is really nice, and I just feel sucky even though I’m kind and compassionate. I also feel stupid for being upset, which makes me more upset.
Yesterday I had a killer migraine and stayed home and watched netfilx romance movies and wished someone would fall in love with me.
I’ve also been binge eating like crazy lately. While I’m bingeing, I think to myself that I should stop and that it’s ruining all my progress, but it’s as if it’s the scolding voice of my grandma or someone and I just brush it away and keep mindlessly eating. I feel like I’m always either starving myself or bingeing.
I just feel so alone. My friends suck and never say they’re sorry or act sympathetic when I’m having a shitty day. They never compliment me, or say how smart or pretty or nice I am, even though I’m sympathetic and compliment them practically every day.
I’m trying not to be whiny and pathetic but I just can’t deal with this sometimes. Please someone love me?